Chapter Four: Alarm Clock

Technology has come a long way the past 10 years or so. Cellphones have become used for soo many things. You can text, call, play games, use it as a stop watch, clock, or even an alarm clock. It's not just cellphones that have developed either. Computers now have cameras that allow us to take pictures or video chat with others. I especially like to skype with my friends. Apparently so does Shelly...at night...all night...

 

 

 

My roommate Darcy lived in the same room as Shelly just across the hall from me and Evy. Shelly was very particular about their room. They were not allowed to sleep with the window open because "it would make Shelly sick". Darcy wasn't allowed to touch any of her candy, not like she would of course. (Shelly had a shoe holder on the closet door with a bunch of candy inside each shoe hole instead of shoes). Shelly has her own way about things....

 

anyways....

 

 

Darcy usually went to bed after Shelly did and one week, Shelly got into the habit of falling asleep while she was skyping her ex-boyfriend. Darcy thought this was pretty weird because Shelly's ex-boyfriend would just play his guitar and watch her sleep. BUT, being the wonderful roommate that she is, she would drag her chair over so she could reach up and turn her computer off for her. This continued for many nights. Darcy was starting to get a little fed up. She went in the next night and sure enough, Shelly's skype was up and brightly shining, filling the whole room with light.

Her ex-boyfriend just sitting there watching her sleep while he practiced his electric guitar. So, once again, Darcy dragged her chair over just like every other night and reached to close it. Darcy was getting really tired of taking care of her at this point and she accidentally closed the computer a little too loud. Shelly woke up and Darcy hit the floor and went into fetal position, hiding from Shelly's wrath for waking her up.

Shelly groggily started talking to herself saying "What? What happened?", and opened her computer back up to get back on skype. (wut.) While all of this was happening, Darcy was maneuvering to her desk and pretended she was reading. Yes, reading in the dark. Once Shelly called her ex-boyfriend back on skype he tattled! He told Shelly everything about how Darcy closes it for her every night. Darcy started to defend herself by saying "I thought you just fell asleep and didn't need it up! I'm sorry!" Shelly lost it at this point; she started yelling, "THAT'S NOT THE POINT! THE POINT IS THAT HE'S MY ALARM!"

 

 

 

 Just for the record, she had an alarm clock, and a cellphone with alarm clock capabilities, but hey, why on Earth would you use those when you can have some guy watch you while you sleep and then wake you up at the appropriate time??

Chapter Three: Prank War

For starters, I am very sneaky. Well at least I like to think I am. When there's a secret mission to be done, I WILL DO IT. Even if my cover is blown and I look all awkward and embarrassed like someone caught you picking a wedgie or something....plus I don't like losing to a bunch of loser boys. It all started with a simple scavenger hunt for Carlton to get his keys back from Cassie who took them the previous night. She wasn't going to keep them forever, she just wanted to have a little fun. We were even going to feed him dinner at the very end of it for a reward! It was all fun and games until he decided he didn't want to do it.

 really?

Before we get into this, here is a room key (haha get it? It's so punny!). Carlton lives with four other guys. His apartment consists of himself, Dustynn (Dusty), Francis, Ammon and Mr. Bear. Cassie's apartment consists of herself, Kaylie, Lola, Elizabeth (Lizzy) and then my apartment with me, Evelynn (Evy), Darcy and Shelly. Now we can get into this....Carlton and his posse decided they would get his keys back on their own terms. Now, the girls that live in Cassie's apartment usually leave the door unlocked. So the boys snuck over and stole their oval and bean bag chairs. Cassie and Lizzy soon after got home from class and Cassie ran across the parking lot to get revenge. She pulled out Carlton's key and stormed into the guys apartment. She grabbed the furniture unsuccessfully and stuffed Mr. Bear down her jacket knowing that the guys would not go after it there. Now, Mr. Bear is not just any normal teddy bear. Carlton loves this bear more than life itself it seems. While she was running away with Mr. Bear, Dusty tackled her and stole her keys right from her pocket! 

 

 

pretty much just like this, sadly...

So Cassie got up and ran as fast as she could so she could go lock herself inside and stash the bear. The guys thought this was going too far. So to try and make it a "fair trade" the guys raided Cassie's apartment, using their newly acquired key, while Kaylie was sleeping (of course) and the rest of the girls were in class. They took Lola's phone and Cassie and Lizzy's Texas flag and Texas clock (this is the biggest insult known to a Texan...well, aside from making fun of the way they talk or saying that Texas isn't the best state ever). Cassie went to go make a trade to get the phone and Texas paraphernalia back. They decided Lola's phone and the Texas things for Mr. Bear. They traded but of course the boys just had to be clever and kept the battery to Lola's phone.
 

pretty sure this is how Carlton felt....

 

Cassie soon realized they had the battery so she ran back to their apartment to confront them. There was another struggle and the boys got Carlton's keys back. They were pretty content on where they were at the moment. Us girls on the other hand needed to get ahead, and fast.

 

Meanwhile, while all of this was going on, I was in class. I kept getting texts for help and advice for good strategy. I was seriously debating leaving class...is that bad? But my friends needed me! 

 

why can't life have easier decisions...

 

Well class finally got out and I called Cassie right away. I practically ran to her apartment to see what I could help with. I ran in and we immediately devised a plan. I then learned that somehow in the jumble of things they got a key to my apartment as well. Thank you Darcy...

 

you had one job...

 

 

Well we got our ranks together and went over to Carlton's posse's apartment. We got Francis's home teacher to get them to open the door. We then sprinted in and grabbed their gamer controllers. Good one right? We all grabbed one and ran for our lives! We made it back safe with ALL of their controllers. We stashed them at Cassie's next door neighbors. Our band dispersed and waited for their surrender. All was well and we were winning. Victory right? Sweet, sweet victory...? NO. The gang came bursting into my apartment because they thought we stashed the controllers there. Evy's study group was over and was scared out of their wits! The boys started rummaging through everything. Everyone was in shock. Shelly came out of her cave to see what was going on and immediately started yelling:
 
GET OUT. NOW. I'M GOING TO CALL THE MANAGER AND GET YOU GUYS KICKED OUT. GET OUT!! NOW!!

I don't know what was going through her head as to why they were there but

this ^ is pretty accurate I suppose.

 
 
and then all of us girls were just sitting there like this:

 

I was trying so hard to keep from laughing. I was dying! The boys left and I sprinted over to Cassie's place. I ran in out of breath and died on the floor in a fit of laughter. I told the girls what happened and we all had a fit of giggles. The boys were so scared! In the end, everyone got their things back and we might have gotten in trouble a little bit with a dorm manager...potatoes, potawtoes... Needless to say, every time after that, if anyone was bugging us, we told Shelly and she took care of us.

 

 

 

Chapter Two: Double Butter

If you are a boy, you would not understand the needs us women have when we come into a crisis. It can be anything from a missing bottle of nail polish to "He has a girlfriend?!". Desperate times call for desperate measures. Usually there is cookie dough involved. For us, (Darcy, Evy and me) the "usually" is not in that sentence. I'm quite surprised that we haven't ended up like this:

 

(hey Evy and Darcy, "we're cats...." )

 

One night that followed a particularly taxing day with many crises for all of us girls. (Except Shelly, because who knows what goes on in that cave of hers). It was about one in the morning and we had to eat our feelings away with that chocolatey heaven. We went to the fridge to start downing our stash but of course our day just had to get worse because we were out of cookie dough! We went to Shelly (since we still had a bunch of homework and Shelly just sits on her computer all day doing nothing important but watch youtube videos or skype) and asked her to make us some cookie dough while we worked on our homework. It took some coaxing but she finally came around when we offered our ingredients. She then got to work. After about forty-five minutes of making a dent in our homework, Shelly left the kitchen to go check her skype. We were getting impatient so we slithered to the kitchen to check her progress. I can just imagine we looked like this:

 

I cannot wait for this cookie dough...

 

After our scouting expedition we discovered ALL of our butter was gone. I looked in the trashcan and there were five wrappers for five sticks of butter. Let me tell you, what recipe uses FIVE STICKS OF BUTTER?! I do NOT need to gain weight...my figure is just fine. I motioned to the girls and they saw what laid in front of them. We soundlessly agreed not to judge and to just see how the cookie dough turned out. We went back to doing our homework and at last she finished the dough. We thanked her graciously and let her go back to, who knows what she was doing. We immediately dug in without taking a single breath:
 

 

 

 
 

Then we all stopped and looked at each other. There was definitely wayyyyy too much butter in this dough. All of our faces immediately turned to this:
 



 

How could you ruin such perfection?! Such beauty?! We silently gave each other looks of what-in-the-world-did-I-just-put-in-my-mouth, and I-just-literally-ate-a-chunk-of-butter-with-a-chocolate-chip-in-it. We decided that next time we would just make it ourselves. We would save money and our stomach's.....besides, who does homework right?

Chapter One: Toilet Trauma

 

There's one thing you should know about me...I don't know how to unclog a toilet. I try and I try and I plunge and I plunge but nothing goes down. The first week I was at school, I naturally had to use the facilities...I get up to go but theres someone in the bathroom already. Patiently, I wait my turn and finally after half an hour, Shelly walks out. I'm not sure if she even washed her hands...so I walk in trying not to touch anything and lift up the lid to do my business. I look down and floating there is the nastiest mix of green, brown, and toilet paper I have ever seen.

THE TOILET WAS CLOGGED.

 

I could not believe my nose....it was PUTRID.

 

I gasped for air and tried to mask the stench with pumpkin spice air freshener that Shelly ironically bought for the bathroom. (Note to self: never buy this scent for my home.) So I just left the bathroom and went to the kitchen in hope that I could wash this from my hands and mind. Since I clearly could not use my bathroom for my excretory needs I went downstairs to a friends place who doesn't ask questions. Evelynn came home shortly after I got back and went straight to the bathroom. I thought about stopping her but that would ruin the fun. She ran out of the bathroom like this:

 

WHAT IS THAT?!

 

The sad significance of this story is not only that Shelly did this to us once but five to six times a week. Sometimes twice in one day. She usually didn't come out for at least an hour or two.

 

To Evelynn I will always be grateful. She could always unclog them for us. Such an trooper...

 



Once upon a time...

My name is Stefanie and I got accepted to the school I wanted to go to! I was so excited I could not contain myself.

 

It went a little something like this...

shameful but true....

 

 I didn't even wait for the replies from the other schools!

I immediately accepted and started working on getting housing and everything. I got a room in the dorms and immediately tried contacting my roommates through facebook and the school e-mails provided. I found one of my roommates on facebook pretty quickly, her name is Evelynn. Me and Evelynn seemed to get along really well. We were fast friends. I soon after found Shelly. I try not to judge and I think I do a pretty good job of that when I actually try but she had the GRIM REAPER as her profile picture.....on the outside I was like:

 

 she seems nice...

 

 but on the inside I'm like:

why did I not room with friends...

 



We chatted a little here and there but we didn't really seem to click like me and Evelynn. Nonetheless, I was sooo super excited to go to that frigid wasteland!

This blog is about our adventures as friends and our encounters with the one we call Shelly ;) I'll try and have a new story up every Wednesday! Or whenever I feel like it...haha